Shall Not Be Infringed My Achin’ ASS!

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I got a notice in the mail here a while back informing me that my State Mandated Concealed Carry Permit was scheduled to expire in about a month or so.

Strike one, the State says I have to have a “permit” to put my pistol in my pocket if I so desire when I go out and about amongst the crazies out there.

This notice informs me that because of the Covid /lockdown stupidity that I should make sure and renew this permit AT LEAST a month before it actually expires because the local Sherrif’s office, who actually administers and approves these “permits”, is backed up until sometime beyond human reckoning and one can expect delays because of this situation.

My “permit” is scheduled to expire EXACTLY 30 days from the time of this writing so I figured I had better get on the stick and take care of this task that I consider to be an abomination and an affront to my God given right to protect myself so that the damn thing doesn’t expire before I get a new one.

Sure.

As is the usual with any damn thing I try to do, this seemingly simple task turned into a mess, of course.

The first thing I did was grab the notice, clean all the shit out of my pockets in case they have a metal detector at the door and head straight to the bank to get the $32 renewal fee in cash.

Here we go.

I pulled up to the Drive Through ATM, stuck my card in it and punched in the stuff they wanted.

“Card Declined” flashing on the screen.

WTF?

I know damn good and well there is money in the bank so I tried it again, and again.

“Card Declined, Please Contact Your Banking Institution”.

I’m sure you can imagine the Blue Streak wafting out of the drivers side window at this point.

Luckily, it’s a week day and the damn bank is right there.

So I whip around and pull up,park and start to head inside.

Oh hell no, gotta have a damn mask.

Go back, dig around, find some nasty looking thing in the door pocket, slap it on and head inside.

Yadda, Yadda, Yadda.

Yes there is money in the bank, by the way, did I just try and use the ATM outside?

Yeah, it’s messed up.

Gee, thanks so much FOR PUTTING A FUCKING SIGN ON THE GOD DAMN THING HONEY!

Too far to walk for ya?

Fuck it, I have been having issues with the chip on that card and since your laziness has caused me to be here now, you can just order me a new fucking card anyway sweet cheeks.

Got that shit straightened out, got followed by a cop all the way to the exit downtown after he pulled back onto the highway from having someone else pulled over and finally managed to get down town and relocate the Court House and the Sherrif’s office.

Then try to find a place to park. More hilarity but I finally found a spot that has a meter and guess what?

It isn’t taking any change so I gotta use my card…

The same one that just didn’t work.

By some miracle it did for this so I paid, went back and put the tag on my dash because I know from past experience that they have a Meter Maid dedicated to one simple task down there. Drive around handing out parking tickets if you are expired by 38 seconds or more.

That is literally all she does, drive around and around that block the Court House is on writing parking tickets.

All day.

It’s obviously a very lucrative racket and this is because every square inch of parking in the parking lot next to the joint is “Reserved Parking” so it’s a battle to find an open spot anywhere within two blocks of the joint in the first place. All those even remotely close by have parking meters.

Coming and going man, coming and going.They got that shit figured right the fuck out.

Walk around the building, see a couple guys waiting outside with paperwork. Go in, get the usual GOTTA HAVE A MASK bullshit, whip the nasty thing back out of my coat pocket, put it on and INSTANT blindness.

Fucking glasses fogged up so bad I couldn’t see the fat and ugly bastard behind the plexi glass two feet in front of me.

He starts asking me questions, I can’t even see who I am talking to and I am fumbling around getting my wallet open to get my ID and the literal scrap of paper that is all that is left of the “Permit” they issued five years ago.

Back when I first got this thing, they sent me a paper card with my name and the “permit” number on it. Since they found out that paper cards disintegrate inside wallets after a while, they now issue plastic cards with your picture on it just like a drivers license.

I blindly stick it out in front of me and he has to come around the plexi glass barrier to get it out of my hand.

Then he asks me if I have filled out the forms.

Uhm, no, I literally just walked in the door.

Dumb fucking bastard. WTF?

He takes my ID and the scrap of “permit” and takes it over to the lady in the office and then tells me I can get it back when I pay the fee. Then he tells me I gotta go back outside and wait.

No offer of any forms to fill out.

See my reaction just above and repeat it.

I wait for a few, suddenly realize that this is going to take way longer to get done than the amount of time I paid for on the meter so I tell another guy waiting that I will be right back and if the call for me I am going to put more money on the meter. Walk clear around the building again, whip out the card and put three fucking hours on the meter. Stick the receipt on the dash so the Meter Maid will move along to find another unfortunate soul to crush and head back in.

Sure as shit they have called everyone waiting inside while I was gone so I gotta go talk to the moron again. Except that one ain’t there anymore and now there is a chick.

Tell her whats going on, finally get the damn form to fill out, am told for the third time to keep my mask over my nose, sit down and wait.

Get almost done with the paperwork and here she comes wanting me to go pay. Do that, finish the paperwork and go sit down to wait. About five minutes later, some other short, fat and very ugly woman sticks her head out of some booth I hadn’t noticed and calls my name.

Go inside, take off the ball cap, glasses and mask to get my picture taken.

Then I am told that because of the back log, to not be surprised it it takes SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS to get my replacement “permit”.

And if my “permit” expires before I get the new one, do not carry concealed.

Then she tells me because this is an Open Carry state, that I can feel free to open carry if I would like.

Apparently she hasn’t seen the fifteen or so news stories that I have over the last couple of years about guys getting the cops called on them by panicked Sheeple who freaked the fuck out because said guy was walking around with a pistol on his hip.

So after all that, I am now waiting on a renewed “permit”.

My question here for anyone who wants to bite is this.

If I am supposed to have the right to bear arms free of infringement by the government, what do you call each and every step of the above process individually and especially taken all together?

Please be aware that the first fool who tries to argue that this process is “For The Common Good”, to “Think Of The Children” or that this whole thing is just “Common Sense Gun Control”, should be prepared to be interrupted mid sentence by yours truly to inform them that they are so full of shit that their breath stinks like the bottom of an outhouse at the end of a 3 day music festival, in August.

50 thoughts on “Shall Not Be Infringed My Achin’ ASS!”

  1. If I have to do that bullshit for a right, then the same should be true for voting. If the motherfuckers cannot apply the “rules” they lied into place for all rights, then all the rules are bullshit.

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  2. You get off cheap. Here in Communesota, it’s taking ANOTHER class (usually $75 minimum, 4 hours, and shooting again) and then paying the Sheriff to run another background check and paying at least $70 (I live in the cheapest county) for the pleasure.

    And you need the permit for open-carry, but the po-po can’t ask for your permit willy-nilly. Go figure.

    Good news is most of the state is a powderkeg thanks to Timmy Walz, his bald female-ish sign interpreter and the faggy bug bullshit.

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  3. “For The Common Good”, to “Think Of The Children” or that this whole thing is just “Common Sense Gun Control”, But, but Phil it is! think of us poor chaps out there don’t have to go through this bullshit… ain’t being a king in a constitutional carry state the bee’s knees? I can get and have gotten a CHGL here so I can carry in Washerton and Ory-gun…. Montana and Wyoming, Utah with no problems. It was easy to obtain, my DL, and a simple form and $20.00 and I walk away with a smile and having a hardy “Good afternoon sir, and have a nice day.” with a very pretty girl at the Sheriff’s office in the court house. I even got to keep my South Dakota Enhanced CHGL and I will be able to renew tat one too.

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  4. Oh man, I’ve had experiences like this. If prison dind’t suck so bad, people would be dying over this BS.

    And people want government in charge of more shit.

    Well, no argument here. Fas as I’m concerned there should be no law disallowing me to own an Ohio Class Nuke sub bristling with Nuklar weapons. The purpose of 2A is so I can protect myself from the government. That’s been out the friggn window since the military enhanced their weapons beyond muskets, cannons, and swords.

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  5. Why? WHY? Because National Socialists since the Woodrow Wilson administration (including the WW admin) have been trying to revoke the whole of the Bill of Rights, and have been hammering the living dogshit out of the 2nd Amendment, because if you get rid of the 2nd, then the other 9 fall like a house of fucking cards.

    Amazing that “SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED” actually says, using an electron microscope, like the card from the movie “The Santa Clause,” except where butthurt leftists, pussy-ass scared bureaucratic knobsuckers and other infantile self-centered limpwristed slopeheaded lackwits get all butthurt over people actually having power granted over the state and the statist asshole losers.

    Isn’t it strange that in 1783 they were able to write so small and precisely?

    Ether that or it’s actually a globalist-backed attack on the United States using all the aforementioned butthurt leftists, pussy-ass scared bureaucratic knobsuckers and other infantile self-centered limpwristed slopeheaded lackwits to tear down this nation from inside.

    Or something similar.

    Jerks, stupid jerks that need to be whacked hard and told to shut up and go sit in the corner and quit flapping their manginas and fenises.

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    • “manginas and fenises.” I like that, may I copy that and use it Beans? Hopefully if we have to go to war, we can eliminate ” butthurt leftists, pussy-ass scared bureaucratic knobsuckers and other infantile self-centered limpwristed slopeheaded lackwits” and tear down every law that has been written since Woody Wilson and declare that only the Constitution and BOR is the law.

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  8. As Mr Biden displayed today, the problem isn’t because conservatives MIGHT go off if armed. It’s because liberals KNOW they can’t be trusted to NOT go off. Thank you President Trump for not bombing everybody (as they said you would).
    There is just too much irony as they DO all the things they accused would be done before, now ongoing.

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  9. My most recent lesson three years ago was not to renew early in Tennessee, because for every month early you renew is a month you’re gonna get fucked out of.

    But it doesn’t matter any more; I’m not renewing my permit five years from now. Fuck ’em. I’m not paying a fee to exercise a Constitutional right any more. I’ve been paying these cocksuckers for thirty years and they’re no closer to Constitutional Carry in this state than they were thirty years ago. Other states are getting CC, Tennessee can’t eve get a vote to the floor because it gets killed in committee by da different fucking RINO every year.

    Jorge and Ice Dawg down in the hood carry without a permit, why can”t I?

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  11. well, look at it this way…do you REALLY want any yahoo walking around with a loaded gun without any adult supervision, considering how stupid some of our fellow americans are?

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    • Short answer, Yes. Who is qualified to determine that it is OK for you to carry? This will be the same individual/institution that will decide what car you can buy and how many children you can have too.

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    • Last I checked, murder is still illegal. What you murder with doesn’t matter.

      You can kill someone with distilled oleander, with arsenic, with water, with a hammer, with a car, with my mother-in-law’s cooking, with, well, anything.

      If we ban guns, then what’s next? Knives? Forks? Spoons? Plants? Chemicals? Life itself?

      If we’d just go to constitutional open carry, then my fat ass could carry a gun and actually get to it if I need it. Which I have needed 4 times in my life, but because of butt-hurt assholes I can’t carry to protect myself. So instead I use a Roofing Hatchet/Hammer thingy. Or a Dirk. All which could have netted me days, weeks, months, years in the pokie because of ‘brandishing a weapon.’

      Fuck weapons control laws. Fuck them all.

      Our founding fathers wanted us to, if we wished, to leave the house looking like, well, some open-carry LARPer if we wished, because that’s how you keep enemies foreign and domestic under control.

      Seriously. put a bounty on douche-canoes and criminals and let the people do a better job of protecting each other than most police departments (who have turned into regulatory enforcement, rather than criminal enforcement.)

      The Right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.

      And the best people to ‘enforce’ proper use of said arms? The people. Us. You (maybe, not sure with what you wrote) and the other people here and there and everywhere.

      Don’t want ‘Arms’ in your business? Then you should carry an inordinate amount of insurance so when, not if, you get robbed and one of your employees or patrons gets hurt they can sue the mother-humpin ass off and your insurance will pay, to a point. Because making a Gun or Weapon Free zone means that pickings are easy.

      Seriously, how many successful during business hours robberies of gun shops have happened versus unsuccessful with the robbers taking dirt naps? Now look at pot-shop ripoffs, or convenience stores (there’s a reason those places are called ‘stop-n-robs.’

      No. Our founding fathers were right. The right to be armed and of self defense are given to us by our creators.

      What should be required? Citizenship testing before voting.

      If every ‘right,’ from voting to abortions to driving to eating to raising kids to opinionating on forums and blogs, required all the bull-scat it takes to ‘legally’ own and use a gun, then, damn, you’d hear hollering from everyone.

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  12. I feel your pain. My CCP expired last year. For a renewal it was complete the form, finger prints, picture, and $30. My first trip to the courthouse I was turned away as they were closed and doing a 30- day quarantine. I was told the expiration was extended by 6 months. A month later they were open but you had to fill out the papers, send them in, get an email to set up an appointment. Two months go by and no email. I call and was informed they changed the process. It was now download the forms and fill them out and get it notarized then sign up for an appointment on-line. The first available appointment is 5 weeks out. I show up and they reject my paperwork as the notarization has to be within the past thirty days. I had to go back on-line and set up another appointment. I got the paperwork notarized the day before the appointment. I show up with the paperwork and they took credit card only, charged an extra $5 expedite fee, didn’t bother with new fingerprints or picture because of the Kung Flu they would use what was on file. I got a paper receipt that would work as my permit until I received my card some 6 weeks later. It took me 9 months and 4 trips to the courthouse to get the same card with a new expiration date.

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  13. Aaand be prepared to wait if’n to renew there’s gotta be a new background check run.

    Mine expired the 19th of last month January) which date I’d noticed three months in advance so I got in touch with my state police for the forms at that time but was informed I’d have to wait until the expiration date was just 30 days out before I could apply for renewal – that done on the 20th of December I figured I’d have it in hand before the new administration got sworn in.

    No such luck – though my state police okayed everything and informed me so it was only on the 22nd of this month the website I have to check for the status of my renewal informed me the (federal) background check only just then got okayed and that the only thing holding my newly renewed card up currently is waiting for the printing process to be finished and I could expect my “new” license to “be in the mail” within the next two weeks.

    What’s vexatious about the whole shebang to me is that, on the very first application I made years and years ago I had the license in hand within 8 days (2 of which was a weekend) and subsequent renewals (2) had me holding the “new” license on the expiration date shown on the just then expired license.

    I thank my lucky stars I haven’t had to leave the state in the interim.

    Still I am of the opinion something fishy is going on.

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    • Had a survey done to split off 9 acres for the in-laws to put a house on, as they’ll both be retired soon. Went to the county office, no public access, dropped paperwork in box.

      Two months later, 4 separate back-and-forth mailings, and only one call to me for clarification and it’s finally over.

      All could have been done in an hour visiting the three offices to check everything was correct.

      There is a limit to what people can take, and it is very, very close.

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      • But to the bureaucrats, that two months’ time is a feature. Because inconveniencing the subjects is the prime reason most bureaucrats exist.

        Can’t wait for the 15 days to flatten the curve to be over. I’ve seen less curves on a zaftig babe.

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        • Better news yet! Got a call about an address on the new property yesterday, figured it was all good.

          Got a letter with all the paperwork, checks and all back this morning because of five missing words in the Quit Claim: “Taxes to be paid by”…

          My list is getting longer…

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  14. I used to have a NY CC permit and I thoroughly sympathize. I now have a FL (where I live) and a UT. Just renewed the UT. A selfie and $25 and two weeks later my new permits arrived in the mail. That’s how it should go.

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    • Here in Idaho to get an Enhanced permit even with the county shutdowns because of the beer flu took only two weeks and the Sheriff called my 3 days after submitting the paper work to come in and get fingerprinted and a mug shooted and my permit arrived from Meridian where the state po po are located

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  16. mine expired a few years back. I didn’t renew. i carry every day pretty much everywhere. it’s been years, it/s just another tax and honestly now it’s just a way for them to track you. fuck ’em. We always say that only the law abiding pay any attention to this shit and the last few years they are busy trying to create us as criminals anyway. They aren’t going to like me as a criminal.

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  17. Alaska went Constitutional Carry a long while back; virtually everyone’s armed anyway because you ain’t the top of the food chain up here. You can still get a permit, but unless you go Outside (I very rarely do) why bother? Love ya’ll like brothers, but there’s too damn many of ya Outside.

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    • Too much snow and cold for me, South Dakota was enough for me… Thinking I want some catfish, pulled pork and sweet tea, where it is warmer, say Alabama, Mississippi…, Arkansas even.

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  18. So how’s that credit card chip enabled atm machine dealio technology driven shit working out for ya eh! Waddah fukin hassle.
    Ya coulda just walked into da bank, sans mask cause anyone knows masks are illegal to wear in banks so they know who’s Robbin em, and got cash. Then the whole bullshit problem goes away and you can tell anyone concerned just fuck straight off eh!

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  19. Wake up gratefully every am and realize that multiple law breaking is in the cards for the day. Local,state and federal. Seems to add a bit o’ zest to life for a senile old fool.

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  21. Pingback: Sunday Linkage « Bacon Time !!!!!!

  22. You went in ASKING to exercise your right.
    Did you seriously believe anything else would of happened in there?
    Can you site just one example where .gov became more efficient (at something other than fucking shit up MORE)?
    Just like everyone else here, the useless bitching doesn’t solve shit.
    The solution to this is simple. Dirt fucking simple.
    Here is the secret why no one has done shit about it.
    Guaranteed results, dumb fucks actually are waiting for that “perfect moment” when they can step off the porch and have no consequences for their actions.
    Wait for the cattle cars, they will be there first.
    Our children and theirs will suffer the fate for our inaction and cowardice.

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