Things were already out of hand but I can’t stop myself apparently.
My name is Phil and I am a Hoarder.
This garage out here is already packed so full of shit that I literally have like little pathways just to get around in it.
So what do I do?
Go get some more shit of course.
I have a buddy who told me that he was going to go over to his sisters and get a truckload of crap and they were going to have a yard sale.
he then told me that there were some Starrett micrometers and a bunch of tools that were going to be there so I should show up.
Yeah, about that.
We are scheduled to go on vacation next month so The Wifely Unit has been snagging all of my extra money to pay for that shit so my discretionary funds are pretty slim right now.
If you are married you know how it works, she has money, we have money but I don’t have any money.
Gotta love that arrangement don’t ya?
But I said Fuck It and stopped and snagged a few bucks out of the ATM and headed over there, it’s only a little over a mile away.
Holy crap was I not expecting what I found. Some of the stuff was from a friend of hers who had been a mechanic since Jesus had training wheels and there was a SHIT TON of tools and equipment there!
I started in looking around and thought to myself that it’s a damn good thing I didn’t have much money because I could have spent a paycheck there probably.
The first two things I saw were a couple of nasty looking old apprentice machinist boxes full of crap. A Kennedy and a Craftsman. I have been wanting one of those for over a year now but everyone wants an arm and a leg for them.
They were rusty and dirty but not dented to fuck.
I kept on going and saw all kinds of stuff I would have liked to have but remembered the amount of funding I had available so I asked his sister what she wanted for one of them. I about had a runaway inside when she said $10 apiece. (Insert poker face here) One of them had about twenty old metal files in it and those were ten bucks too.
It only took me long enough to see some other old bastard looking at the boxes for me to tell her that I would take them both.
So I paid her and then I started BS’ing with my buddy for a while. Pretty soon he says I need to look at the Starrett Micrometer.
I take a look and it’s a nice one, still in the case but it’s like a three inch micrometer.
A bit too big for what I need and way more money than I had anyway.
Next thing I know, his sister comes over and says she has some other Starrett stuff but it belongs to this old dude who isn’t there.
She opened up a box full of stuff and inside is two older Starrett dial indicator kits, still in the boxes, for $100 apiece.
Fuck. Now the pressure is on because I want one of those damn things.
Pretty soon she says that she can cut the price some and because I am friends with her brother, we can see what we can come up with.
To make this long story shorter, I walked out of there with both tool boxes and the dial indicator, for $64.00, everything I had on me.
You see, this is how I justify this hoarding problem.
That was a ridiculously good deal.
Now where ya gonna put that shit Sport?
That’s the fucking problem.
So I spent the next four hours cleaning all the crap out of the drawers, there were a few keepers but most of it was mechanics junk drawer kind of shit.
Then it was a good scrubbing and most of a can of WD-40 cleaning the boxes up as much as I could.
Then it was move a bunch of shit around out in the garage to make room for one of them up on the bench.
I think what needs to happen here is I need to have a fucking yard sale of my own and get rid of some of this crap I have laying around.
That way I could make a little money.
And room for more stuff.